Addictive Thinking: Concept of Time.

For an alcoholic or addict to say "I can stop whenever I want" becomes the most frustrating sentence that family and friends will hear! Anyone close to an alcoholic/addict will have seen countless times how the addict will "stop" and make innumerable resolutions. Abstinence may be for hours, days and sometimes weeks. But ordinarily the active practice of addiction resumes. This may go on for years and for many, until death!

I hear and see family and friends totally bewildered by the alcoholic/addict. I hear them say "How can a person insist that he can stop at any time when it's obviously not true?" Even therapists may ask themselves, How can an intelligent person be so oblivious to reality? How can a highly intelligent, intellectual man or woman with positions of great responsibility, who can analyse and retain scientific data, not add two plus two in regard to their drinking or drugging?

The answer lies in the addictive thinkers concept of time. For everyone, time is variable. Under certain circumstances, a few minutes can seem like an eternity, while under other circumstances, weeks and months appear to have lasted only moments. So it's quite obvious that when an addict stops for just a few days he believes that he has stopped. The alcoholic or addict may wonder why others can't see that he has stopped. The answer is obvious to his family because the next day the alcoholic is drunk again.

When an active alcoholic stops drinking, his day is sometimes measured in minutes or even seconds to get him through the day. The suffering that he has to go through is tremendous on the mind and the body. Is it any wonder that after a couple of days or so when the alcoholic picks up a drink again, it's quite common for him to say "but it's ages since I had a drink" this makes perfect sense to him, after all he has felt like he has suffered for an eternity. Once again he will say to himself, "I'll just have one to calm me down" and there he goes again, all lit up!!
 
Alcoholics/addicts have very low tolerance and patience levels and addictive substances bring about instant relief. Today many of us are guilty of impatience, new and wonderful technology has created an 'instant pudding generation.' Even if an addict was offered the cheapest drugs, that would give him the best high he'd ever experienced, but would have to wait a day to get the high he would tell you to "get lost" or words to that effect, "what good is that rubbish to me?"
Imagine if a non-addicted person was in hospital in extreme physical and emotional pain after an operation and he was offered painkillers that only kicked in after a day?  I bet you would ask for another Doctor?
I know many addicts who pray for tolerance and patience, and usually they will say "But please G-d I want it now"!

Anyone who participates in risky behaviours such as a sex addict, smoker, drinker or heroin addict, are taking serious chances with their health, but again the consequences are in the "future" and that is not in their conception of time.

When a newcomer enters Alcoholics Anonymous or sees a seasoned Counsellor who really understands addiction, the slogan "One Day At A Time" is a very powerful concept for the alcoholic/addict. It's a measurable amount of time and as long as the alcoholic/addict doesn't take the next drink or drug and receives the correct treatment, he will recover.
Yes an alcoholic/addict can stop at any time. The difficulty is how does he stay stopped?

Parts of this post have been taken from the book: Addictive Thinking. By Abraham Twersky PhD