Confusing Cause and Effect.

If we were a fly on the wall at any AA meeting we would definitely think that we were sometimes at a comedy show, listening to AA newcomers, talk about their day. The other AA members are laughing, because they relate to the absurd thinking of the newcomer and remember the time when they would say the same absurd things. I read somewhere of an 'old timer' who suggested that alcoholic thinking is every bit as destructive as alcoholic drinking. To prove his point the man read the questions from a self test for alcoholism, substituting the words thinking instead of the word drinking. I kept his list on my computer so here it is!

    Are You an Addictive Thinker?

1. Do you lose time from work due to thinking?
2. Is thinking making your home life unhappy?
3. Have you ever felt remorse after thinking?
4. Have you got into financial difficulties as a result of thinking?
5. Does your thinking make you careless of your family's welfare?
6. Has your ambition decreased since thinking?
7. Does thinking cause you to have difficulty sleeping?
8. Has your efficiency decreased since thinking?
9. Is thinking jeopardizing your job or business?
10. Do you think to escape worries or troubles?

The point is that even with the absence of chemicals, distorted, addictive, obsessive thinking, wreaks havoc and makes the alcoholic crazy. I have been told by alcoholics that they can have a whole bunch of people in their head, all talking at the same time, 'the committee' they call it. So is it any wonder they take that next drink, and feel justified in doing so, because that's their only way of shutting everyone up! All Alcoholics believe that their logic  is valid. They not only resist rational arguments to the contrary, but also they can't understand why others don't see the 'obvious.'

Someone who has dyslexia, may want to read the word 'cat' but what he may see is TAC or CTA. But they are certain that they have read the word accurately. Their problem has to do with their perception of how the letters are organized. This does NOT indicate low intelligence; dyslexia can occur in highly intelligent people.
Something similar happens with the alcoholic, who in the main are also highly intelligent people. A woman may drink and take pills because she feels her home life is just too intolerable. She is telling what she perceives to be the truth. Her husband has withdrawn from her, her kids are ashamed of her and treat her with disrespect. She believes that this emotional torture is causing her to drink.
Have you seen the old cartoon of the man complaining to a woman in the bar? saying;
"My wife doesn't understand me"
Woman: "Why doesn't she understand you?"
Man: "She doesn't understand why I drink."
Woman: "Why do you drink?"
Man: "Cos my wife doesn't understand me"

No matter what the reason, attitude of the family or friends, pressure on the job, anxiety attacks, headache or nagging, aching feet, a financial crisis, or any other problem- whatever the alcoholic says is his reason for drinking, the formula is always the same. The short and long of it is that the alcohol usually is the cause of the problems, but the alcoholic believes that the problems cause the drinking.
Therefore to summarize, the woman whose husband has withdrawn from her, although unpleasant, cannot communicate properly with his wife, because of her drunkenness. The kids are angry and ashamed of their Mother, because they can't bring their friends around to the house for fear of unpredictable antics. They have lost respect for her!
Regardless of whether or not an alcoholic is drinking, until the problem of his 'thinking perception' is addressed, the alcoholics perception of reality, will always be distorted.

Please note 'Addict' can be substituted where I have written 'Alcoholic'